Letter to the Anesthesiologist

A birth story *of sorts, published this week in Off Assignment, and a behind-the-essay interview

Who haunts you? —

This question animates the “Letter to a Stranger” column of Off Assignment, a literary magazine with a focus on the “story-behind-the-story” — that is, the story that exists beyond the one that appears on the page. I’ve adored reading this series for years for its evocative stories chronicling how fleeting moments of human connection with a stranger can carry an immense staying-power, and how the ways we witness each other matters, deeply.

This week, my essay, “To the Anesthesiologist,” was published in Off Assignment’s Letter to a Stranger:

“To the Anesthesiologist” nests one story — my experience of giving birth to my daughter, which unfolded in an unexpected emergency C-section — within another: an equally unexpected encounter with a stranger whose presence made an indelible mark on my experience of the birth and its aftermath (and the way I understand this story in my body still today).

I also spoke with Off Assignment about the emotional experience and process of writing this essay in an interview, which you can read below in their newsletter:

I share this story with tenderness and a deep appreciation for the vastness of how birth—at-once the most particular and ubiquitous of human experiences—can unfold. I particularly know how fragile and porous it can feel to hear about others’ birth stories when on a fertility journey and when pregnant. At the same time, I know how powerful it can be to inhabit each others’ intimate, human stories of birth, as they expand the aperture of our appreciation for the wide range of ways we come into the world—as people and as parents.

If you happen to read, I always love hearing how this story finds you, what it stirs within you. If you feel compelled to share this story with someone you think would appreciate it, please do—it means so much. Thank you, always, for being here and spending time with these words.